last night, i learned that my father (i call him my papang) was confined in the hospital for he complained difficulty in urinating, later the doctor found out that his prostate enlarged. i just checked in the net and the medical term fo the diagnosis is BPH or Benign Prostatic Hyperplasia - a common part of aging. the urologist suggested for a surgery. it will be done after all the necessary examinations.
i was so sad after my phone conversation with my papang last night. the sopas (macaroni soup) i meticulously prepared and craved to eat just became tasteless. i was so sad that my papang is in the hospital without me around. yes, my mamang will always be there for him but i know he needs me too. only i can explain to him things in a manner that will make him nod after, only i can make him laugh because i laugh at his old jokes, only i can tell him to relax and listen, only i can make him calm. he listens to me, his youngest.
i so miss my papang and it pains me that i am not by his side. i love him so much.
when i told him to be strong, that the Lord loves him so much, he will get over it soon, it will be better right after the surgery, it's a common thing for aging men like him... etc. i said, "you pray papang ha." you recovered from a two-week stay in the ICU (intensive care unit) so for sure with God's help, everything will be fine."
i knew my father was crying as he was listening to me. he just passed the phone to mamang and said maybe i wanted to talk to her.
no tears for me but my heart was crying. i wanted to hug him and assure him that everything will be okey.
today, when the clock struck noon for lunch break, i called and checked the two beautiful people in my life, my wonderful parents. i treasure them everyday.
thank you, dear Lord for their lives and for my life through them.
